Did you think we were returning to Mayberry
No way, Opie’s long gone and his bank account is very merry
Poor Aunt Bea was molested by some rogue hill billy
And no, it was not Don Knotts, that silly willy.
Andy William were seen at the soccer game today
They sung the British national anthem and then yelled hurrah
Andy’s red hair did not look to be thinning
William of Windsor, in the hair loss competition seemed to be winning.
Nice to see the boys in Africa together
Gone are the days the monarchy kept Negroes in tether
The Queen must be upset to watch so many Blacks in cheer
Not having them in shackles seems kind of queer.
FIFA made it to South Africa for what reason I don’t know
Blacks in poverty pay a year’s wages to watch the show
The HIV afflicted never invited to Buckingham Palace
Andy William either way telling the Captain to check ship’s ballast.
Charlie occupied by Camilla’s visit to the vet
Her teeth to the Bonny Prince were becoming a threat
Either way, Charlie’s readies his kilt should England make it to the big game
Camilla in boxers will no doubt suit her adorable frame.
Diana’s absence to Phillip we must extend our gratitude
She had found love on the wrong latitude
Here is to England, the Royal Family and Andy William
Perhaps the fate of all will be like that of Priam.