Santa Claus
It was a cold and sun lit night
A thin layer of snow blanketed the icy tundra
Sam the Seal looked very comfortable snoring as a hot dog
Polar Bear Pete appeared awfully suspicious smoking a cigar
The Elves were reminiscing atop the igloos
Mrs. Claus was gently basting her behind by a glowing fire
Rudolph had had one too many Jack Daniels for the long road ahead
Santa smiled when a Native told him he looked very well fed
The eve of the big night has become much less stressful
Letters to Santa have diminished in the trillions
Children no longer request the simple things
A flat screen TV and iPhone are just too tough to build with no training
The Elves too have become distraught over current events
Their carving, screwing and painting days were over
Board games have become as relics
The choo choo train has chugged right off the cliff
It’s great that the children of the Body Politic have remained well grounded
Their requests have not changed for centuries
They appeal for austerity and ask for a balanced quantity of gold and diamonds
The secret P.S. means that the pornographic services voucher is still in vogue
Nonetheless, life for Santa has become quite more subdued
A joyride atop a humpback whale occasionally eliminates the blues
He now spends more time talking to his old Anunnaki friends, and
Yes he is learning how to play with that confounded HAARP
Christmas comes but one time a year
But lately it feels just like another day for Santa
Sadly, he came to believe his time was up
That is, until Mrs. Claus told him there may be a pole shift.
Thank you,
Joseph Pede
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